Joe Biden joins the Rapid Tactical Force

Joe Biden, Mall Ninja

Just got the weirdest email…

hello friend,

Last year I made the decision to trust my life on the street to a Beretta shotgun. I got the EELL Diamond Pigeon because it fit my budget (although my budget is pretty much unlimited).

What scares me is that, although I can put two shotshells into it at one time, because of where I live, I’m limited to just those two at any given moment.
Here is the questions. The two-shell solution, although tactically sound for 1872, isn’t very practical today, I would prefer to use a more powerful shotgun like a Benelli M4. What I am worried about is that because of where I live and my frequent exposure on TV, I do not want to become an object of ridicule like David Gregory and Diane Feinstein did when they broke the laws of my city. I have a high-risk security job and I fear that I would be the target for repeated derision from bitter clingers who think I should just get an AR-15, even though they clearly not practical for self-defense, despite the fact that our police and military use them.

Are any of you aware of a tactical shotgun that could be owned in, say, Washington D.C. or somewhere like that? Is there a better way to do this than buying an evil-looking black rifle?

BTW, I am, of course being guarded by a couple of Secret Service agents carrying AR-15’s with a 16″ bbl. The plan is that when I say something stupid again, they will quickly shove me away from the microphones and into a limo. The White House Press Office will then throw up blue smoke to obscure the fact that I’m a blithering idiot. The problem, of course, is when I turn my back, Hilary is right there, waiting.

Explainers here and here.

And on another note, did you ever think we’d see the day when the Vice President of the United States is handing out advice about which long gun is best in a defensive situation?