Two Is One, One Is None… So What Is Three?

Two is one, one is none… so what is three?

Thanks to regular contributor Ed for this whopper.

Police: Family shoots, kills burglar breaking into home

DGCOne family member saw an intruder standing at the back door, trying to break into the home. That’s when at least three of the family members reportedly armed themselves.

One of those family members fired a warning shot above the back doors, telling the intruder to leave,

But the Penas tell police that the person continued to try to enter their home. Police say at least two of the family members then opened fire, killing the suspect in the kitchen area. 

I’m not in favor of warning shots, but let’s face it, if one of them goes whizzing past your ear AND YOU KEEP GOING, you shouldn’t be too surprised if, a few seconds later, your insides are introduced to the outside.

Dead Goblin Count: 474 

Technorati blog claim: E2BTEUEEQVR7

Don’t Try At Home. Or Anywhere Else.

Don’t Try At Home. Or Anywhere Else.

Regular contributor Ed sends in this addition to the DGC: 

DGCBradenton argument ends with man dead

A man was shot dead early this morning in Bradenton after he got into an argument with a woman. 

About 2 a.m., Kerson Edmond, 20, arrived at 3524 30th Lane E. and got into an argument with Olivia Sauceda, according to the Manatee County Sheriff’s Office. The argument got physical, and Edmond, who was armed with a handgun, began beating her.

I have to be honest, when I first read that headline, I was unsure if it was a DGC addition, as an argument is not a reason to go to your guns (more on that tomorrow). However, on further review, if the she was in fear for her life, it’s a righteous shoot.

God made man (and woman). Colonel Colt made them both equal. 

Dead Goblin: 473


When In Doubt, Improvise.

When in doubt, improvise.

DGCI’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: If you carry a gun, carry a phone (and some other stuff, too). This one comes via regular contributor Ed: Kudos to this man for improvising a solution on the spot, but Facebook? Really?  

A Citrus County man kills suspected burglar

A Citrus County man, who doesn’t have a phone, posted to Facebook Tuesday afternoon that there had been an emergency and he needed someone to call 911.

When deputies responded to 13347 S. Old Jones Rd. in Floral City, they discovered a suspected burglar dead.

According to the Citrus County Sheriff’s Office, the deceased man had been shot to death by an adult son of the homeowners who lives in an apartment on the property. 

Dude. One word: Skype. 

Dead Goblin Count: 472

Rats On The West Side, Bedbugs Uptown.

Rats on the West Side, bedbugs uptown.

DGCActually, Phoenix doesn’t really have an uptown, but rats on west side? Oh yeah. 

One fewer than there used to be, however.

Homeowner shoots, kills intruder in Phoenix

Police say a Phoenix homeowner shot and killed an intruder Friday morning.

Sgt. Tommy Thompson, spokesman for the Phoenix Police Department, said a homeowner shot and killed an unknown intruder at his home near 43rd Avenue and Bethany Home.

Thompson said the shooting occurred at 3:19 a.m after the homeowner was awakened by the intruder. He also said it is believed that the homeowner and the intruder did not know each other. 

Thanks to Danno from Sandcastle Scrolls for sending this in, and a reminder, if you see news of a dead goblin pop up online, send ’em in. 

Dead Goblin Count: 471

Should You Get Involved?

Should you get involved?

DGCWhat if your neighbor was in fear for their life? 

Sheriff’s Office: Neighbor kills gunman who wounded two in Kenneth City home

Hearing commotion across the street, a neighbor shot and killed a gunman who had entered a home and badly wounded two men inside Sunday night, a sheriff’s spokeswoman said.

According to Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office spokeswoman Cecilia Barreda, a man who was known to the victims entered the house. He shot two of the several people inside the house, badly injuring them.

A neighbor across the street heard the shooting and ran to the home with a gun. The neighbor shot and killed the gunman, Barreda said.

We use the fire extinguisher analogy to describe why we carry a gun: If our neighbor’s house was on fire, would we rush over with our fire extinguisher to help them out, even if it mean endangering our lives? 

Just something to think about. Thanks to Ed for sending this one in.

Dead Goblin Count: 470

Get To Da Chopper (and Your Gun)!

Get to da chopper (and your gun)!

Dead Goblin CountDanno and Leslie both sent in this addition to the Dead Goblin Count.

Cleveland man fatally shoots home intruder, wounds another

Police in Cleveland say a victim of a home invasion fatally shot one of the would-be robbers and wounded the other.

Twenty-four-year-old Everton Mosby told officers that two men approached him outside his house on the city’s east side early Tuesday and ordered him back inside where they pistol-whipped him.

Mosby — who is licensed to carry a concealed weapon — said he was able to get hold of his gun and shot the two men.

I carry inside my home because there are parts of my home that are further away from my safe room than my front/rear doors, meaning that if someone breaks in, they’re closer to the safe room than I am. 

Not good. 

Besides, if the gun’s on my hip or in my pocket, I know 100% for certain where it is and who has it, something I can’t say for certain if it’s not in my possession. 

Dead Goblin Count: 469

There’s Stupid Prizes, And There’s Nobel Stupid Prizes

There’s stupid prizes, and there’s Nobel Stupid prizes

Dead Goblin CountArmed robbery becomes an exceedingly dicey proposition when the robbee is also armed. Thanks to Shane_W for these two.

Alleged robber shot, killed by store owner ID’d

Police have now released the identity of a suspect who was killed during a robbery attempt at a store on the Southeast Side.
Police say that on Tuesday night, 25-year-old Demarcus Brandon of Riverdale tried to rob a cell phone store in the 1700-block of East 87th Street, but the store owner shot and killed him.
Brandon was pronounced dead at the scene.

The second incident isn’t so happy. Goblin and Paladin alike didn’t make it. 

Attempted robbery victim, suspect killed

Selma police Lt. Curtis Muhannad says 77-year-old Selma resident Willie “Dusty” Berry died of gunshot wounds. Police say he was returning to his home at Highland View condominiums on North Broad Street Tuesday evening when he was approached by two suspects.

Muhannad tells The Selma Times-Journal that investigators think Berry was shot first in his abdomen, then returned fire with his own weapon, striking one suspect in the head. Police say Berry then tried to get to a neighbor’s house and was shot two more times by the second suspect.

Our thoughts and prayers are with the family and friends of Mr. Berry. 

Dead Goblin Count: 468

A Unique Moment In History

A Unique Moment In History

Dead Goblin CountSomeone took Joe Biden’s advice, and it worked! Thanks to Brad_in_MA for this one.

Niles man testifies about firing shot that killed intruder 

Roy Hahn, 41, told jurors Tuesday in Michael Burns’ murder trial that he woke up from a “dead sleep” to hear “a loud crunching or cracking” coming from a side door being pried open.

Moments later, he “looked out the window and saw someone or two people run to the front of the house, so I went back into my bedroom, I grabbed my shotgun, and I heard the front door being pried open, so I shot through the front door.”

Burns is charged with murder, involuntary manslaughter in Allen’s death and attempted aggravated burglary in the July 12 break-in.

Now to be fair, there is a seedy side to this story, as our hero had traces of cocaine in his blood and his house was in such a state of disrepair that the crooks thought it was abandoned (memo to myself: Mow the backyard…), but a bunch of crooks are either behind bars or six feet under. 

All’s well that ends well.

Dead Goblin Count: 466

Thanksgiving Leftovers

Thanksgiving Leftovers

Dead Goblin CountAhh, the holidays, when a young man’s (and woman’s) fancy turns to thoughts of… armed robbery. Thanks to Ed for sending this one in, which is bizarre even by DGC standards… 

Tampa man shot to death while trying to pull off robbery

A Tampa man who was part of a robbery setup was shot to death early Friday by the intended victim and a Pinellas County woman was charged with murder for taking part in the plan, the Hillsborough County Sheriff’s Office said.

Erika T. Sanez had met Travis Weller about a month ago and arranged a date. Sanez met Weller at a different location before taking him to a vacant home. Inside the home, three men were waiting for Weller, according to the Sheriff’s Office.

When they tried to rob him, Weller opened fire. One of the bullets hit, Marlin Walker, 20, once in the chest. Weller called 911, telling a dispatcher that several people had tried to rob him and he had shot one of them.

Man, I thought I had “dates from hell” when I was a single man… 

Next up, if you’re going to do the job, do it right. Thanks to Shane W for these two. 

Bassfield robbery suspect shot at least 10 times, dies

Authorities said a robbery suspect wounded a convenience store owner in Jefferson Davis County but was killed when the owner fired back at least 10 times. 

WDAM-TV reported that the suspect, LeRobert Young of Bassfield, died at the scene. The store owner, who was shot once, was taken to Forrest General Hospital for treatment.

Goblin shoots store owner in leg, robs store, decides to go back for more, wounded store owner retrieves a 9mm in the meantime and introduces robber’s insides to the outside. 

And whatever you do, don’t burglarize rural homes in Kentucky. It is the very definition of a high-risk occupation. 

Burglary Suspect Shot, Killed In Clay County

A suspected burglar was shot and killed in Clay County Wednesday night.

Kentucky State Police say somebody returned to a home on Otter Creek Road, south of Manchester, around 9 p.m., and found a man had broken in. At some point an unnamed person opened fire on the suspected burglar, shooting him once.

Officials say Charles Wagers, 20, was pronounced dead from a gunshot wound.

Or maybe something else. As a recovering J-School attendee, I feel for the reporter on this story, as he/she only can write about what the police are telling them, but come on, get a few facts before you write the story. 

Either way, the Thanksgiving weekend was a busy weekend indeed! 

Dead Goblin Count: 464

How About We Serve Up Two Turkeys For Thanksgiving?

How about we serve up two turkeys for Thanksgiving?

Dead Goblin CountThanks to Shane W. for sending these in. 

Man fatally shot after shooting homeowner

Police are investigating the shooting death of a man inside a duplex on the city’s east side.

Officers were called just before 10:30 a.m. Monday to a home located in the 2400 block of Euclid Avenue in regard to a shooting.

When they arrived, they found two shooting victims inside the home. Police say at least five people were inside when a fight broke out.

Witnesses told police that a man arrived at the home and was let inside. An argument erupted between the man and the homeowner with the visitor shooting the homeowner in the chest. The homeowner returned fire, killing the man, police said.

Elderly Homeowner Fatally Shoots Intruder In Pine County

A Pine County man shot and killed an armed intruder breaking into his house early Thursday morning. A second intruder fled on foot and for much of the morning a manhunt was underway for him

The shooting happened at 2:30 a.m. at a home in rural Sandstone, 90 miles north of the Twin Cities. Authorities believe the homeowner truly feared for his life. 

Moral of the story: A man’s home is his castle, and it helps to have a ballista or two handy to defend the ramparts. 

Dead Goblin Count: 461 (Blew right past .460 SOCOM. Oh well.)